November Guest Blog: In Gratitude
BPAR is committed to providing our readers and clients with the best adoption and mental health resources available. In an effort to continue our mission we have added a new monthly guest blog post.
As the founding partners of Adoption Associates, Deb, Sandy and Toby would like to take a moment during National Adoption Month to reflect publicly on the work that we do. We had a vision more than 15 years ago that there was a need in the Boston area to create a community to support families formed through less traditional means. Parenting is parenting, but when you add adoption (or assisted reproduction and infertility) into the mix, there is an additional overlay of both feelings and responsibilities. We owe our children a positive self image and sense of security in their belonging to a strong solid family – one that in many senses is formed through an initial loss on some part – be in the multiple losses of infertility, or the choice to adopt, or some mixture of both.
So we organized a psychotherapy practice that focuses on strengthening the bonds of adoption and of families – we offer consultation and treatment and an objective sounding board to all lives impacted by the losses, the challenges, and of course, ultimately the joys that go along with adoption. We recognize that sometimes it is hard to sort out exactly what behaviors may be adoption-related, and what may be a developmental stage, and what may just be unique issues in each family. We also understand that at different stages of life, these issues assume different forms and impact on members of different families. In addition, we recognize and celebrate the diversity of the families with whom we work, be they trans-racial, trans-cultural, or part of the rainbow of the GBLTQ community. Differences and similarities – all of what we deal with and support.
We also know and acknowledge that it is not an easy step to reach out to a therapist and seek help, and we thank you for putting your trust in us as we work with your family. We seek to link the right professional with the right family. The need is great, hence, we have expanded and now have 4 additional therapists in our group, all of whom bring their own talents and unique skills to bear on the needs of our families. We offer expressive art therapy, movement therapy, mindfulness, as well as more traditional talk therapy.
We also know that there is a tremendous value of sitting with others who have “walking in our shoes;” hence we have parent support and psycho-educational groups offered for young people and their parents. Some of these groups have continued on long beyond the time frames we initially envisioned, and hence we know they are very valued! Feel free to try one – more are always forming and it can be so helpful to have others witness the struggles, the growth and the changes that come with time and different perspectives and skills. We are here for the “long haul,” meaning that we value a wellness model, where some families just come to “check in” on a periodic basis, rather like an annual physical with a physician.
Whether you are a birth parent, an adoptive parent, an adopted person, or even a professional who works with this population in other settings (such as schools, medical practices, out-patient or in-patient settings) we bring a particular focus to the kind of work we do, and we offer trainings and support – so reach out and ask for our help. We remember past clients who have moved on, and feel free to just send us updates or questions as you wish.
We celebrate the commitment and hard work of our individual clients and families, not to mention all the service providers who help with their support.
Written by the founding partners of Adoption Associates: Debra N. Olshever, M.ED., LCSW, Sandra J. Orenstein, MSW, LICSW, and Toby Zaitchick, M.ED., LMHC
Adoption Associates. Since 1999, Adoption Associates has supported those whose lives have been touched by adoption, infertility or related losses. Each of our therapists has personal and professional training and experience with adoption. We have a wide range of skills and expertise, enabling us to offer a variety of therapeutic techniques and modalities tailored to your needs. To find a full list of services and providers visit their website.
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