Book Reviews: Adoption Is a Lifelong Journey

Review from Jordan Rich's WBZ Book Club!

WBZ Jordan Rich Book Club Review 1:01

Review from Podcaster Candy O'Terry!

Podcaster Candy O’Terry’s Book Review 1:01

Here's what adoption experts are saying about BPAR's book, Adoption Is a Lifelong Journey.

We are honored that renowned author/marriage & family therapist Nancy Verrier posted a full book review of Adoption Is a Lifelong Journey on the BPAR blog.

"Some books have the power to change lives, to heal souls. Adoption is a Lifelong Journey is one of those books. Sensitively written and artfully drawn, it's the only book I've seen that gives voice to the child adoptee in an accessible, empowering and truthful way. Every family touched by adoption and the foster care system should own — and use — this book."

—Steve Pemberton, Founder, A Chance in the World and author of A CHANCE IN THE WORLD: AN ORPHAN BOY, A MYSTERIOUS PAST, AND HOW HE FOUND A PLACE CALLED HOME


"This gentle book is something every adoptive and foster family should have on their shelf - as well as every community member who works with children, from educators to clergy to medical and mental health practitioners. Each page beckons the adults in the room to step into the shoes of the child, providing insights and tools to help educate and empower families and create a healthy environment for children to thrive."

—Jean A. S. Strauss, author of BIRTHRIGHT: THE GUIDE TO SEARCH AND REUNION FOR ADOPTEES, BIRTHPARENTS, AND ADOPTIVE PARENTS


"The only way to understand adoption is from the adopted child's perspective. Adoption is a Lifelong Journey is a wonderful tool to help professionals and parents talk to adoptive children. The book truly lets these children know that they are not alone and their voices matter. In addition, it delivers great information regarding how adoption affects a person throughout their lifetime. If you are an adoptive parent or professional, please read this book!"

—Dr. Sue Cornbluth, author of BUILDING SELF ESTEEM IN CHILDREN AND TEENS WHO ARE ADOPTED OR FOSTERED


"Adoption is a Lifelong Journey is the best book of its kind that I have ever read. All adoptive parents and prospective adoptive parents need to read this book. It is superb."

—Joe Soll, LCSW, adoptee, psychotherapist and author of ADOPTION HEALING… a path to recovery


"Adoption is a Lifelong Journey is a beautifully written book that helps parents and caregivers understand the unique needs of foster and adopted children from their perspective. This book is a valuable resource for both parents and clinicians to read with children as a way to help validate the many thoughts and feelings they have when becoming a part of a new family."

—Lisa Dominguez, LCSW-C, Director of Clinical Services, C.A.S.E. Center for Adoption Support and Education


"The title of this book sets the tone for the lessons it describes. It is important for adoptive parents to know that adopting a child is not the same as giving birth. It is certainly not the same for the child, and it is important for the parents to understand this. This book is especially helpful because it explains the ways in which a child sees him or herself in the adoptive family and how the parents can validate, acknowledge, and empathize with the child’s experience.

"It is important to know that, although it may imply that the child may have experienced some neglect, abuse, or cultural changes, all children who have been separated from their original mothers and placed with biological strangers will experience many of the same feelings and fears. The sensitive and gentle ways in which these truths are presented makes this book easy for children and parents to understand and accept. The authors have reminded parents that it is easy for them to get triggered by their child’s behavior and that they need to take care of themselves so that they can be the adults, be patient, demonstrate understanding, and be the support their child needs, without taking on his/her loss and pain. This is the path to true connection and joy.

"It is my hope that these talented authors at Boston Post Adoption Resources will write a sequel to this book so that even more adoptee experiences and beliefs can be explored and worked on in a truly empathic, loving, and transformative way."

—Nancy Verrier, author of THE PRIMAL WOUND and COMING HOME TO SELF


"Adoption is a Lifelong Journey is a gem! It's filled with simple wisdom shared in a smart and loving way that will make such a difference in the lives of children and their caregivers. Filled with important guidance and helpful resources, this book would be a welcomed addition to any family who cares deeply about the welfare of their loved ones. Oh, and I love the bear…"

—Cheryl Richardson, NY Times bestselling author of THE ART OF EXTREME SELF-CARE


"Adoption is a Lifelong Journey is a wonderful new contribution to adoption literature. The book offers important insights into issues and concerns that adoptive children often have (as narrated by young adoptee Charlie and his bear), and then provides suggestions for action: prompts for further deliberation and conversation, and additional resources on critical topics in adoption. Concise and accessible, it's not only a very useful tool for parents, but for their loved ones, their children's caregivers and educators -- really anyone who interacts with and wants to support adoptees and adoptive families. A great new resource."

—Elisabeth O’Toole, M.Ed., author of IN ON IT: WHAT ADOPTIVE PARENTS WOULD LIKE YOU TO KNOW ABOUT ADOPTION


"Adoption is often viewed as finished once a child is placed but as the title says, Adoption Is a Lifelong Journey. This children's book covers many of the issues with a story and delightful illustrations (love the teddy bear). More importantly it links issues to resources for the adoptive family. An excellent resource for children and families. Adoption is a Lifelong Journey should be helpful to many families."

—Regina M. Kupecky, LSW, co-author of PARENTING THE HURT CHILD: HELPING ADOPTIVE FAMILIES HEAL AND GROW


"Great job! This will be a great blessing to those touched by adoption."

—Sherrie Eldridge, author of TWENTY THINGS ADOPTED KIDS WISH THEIR ADOPTIVE PARENTS KNEW


"Adoption is a Lifelong Journey is an excellent read for adults working or caring for a child who has been through the adoption or foster care process. In fact, any individual concerned with the emotional well-being of a child, who has faced adversity, would benefit from reading this book. The insights offered in this book are helpful in providing understanding and support for kids across a range of family backgrounds. The recommended activities and resources are practical and can easily be applied. This book helps adults build the emotionally safe, caring spaces for children, giving them to tools to help them thrive."

—Lemuel Ivy, Assistant Principal, Sokolowski Elementary, Chelsea Public Schools


"This book is special. Co-authored by 3 therapists who work entirely with post adoption issues, they know what they’re talking about. Any and all of the suggestions in these 36 pages will help improve the quality of life for an adoptee. Doesn’t matter if they were adopted as an infant or placed as an older child from foster care. The book helps to normalize the feelings and thoughts an adoptee might have, while educating parents. Written in a light hearted manner, the illustrations are adorable, diverse and match the tone. Added bonus: up-to-date resources in the "grown up" section. Congratulations on creating a superior post adoption book!"

—Beth O’Malley M.Ed, adoptee, adoptive mom, and author of LIFEBOOKS: CREATING A TREASURE FOR THE ADOPTED CHILD


"If I have one piece of advice for ANY parents who have older children via adoption ESPECIALLY if the child came to you via foster care, it would be to Get This Book. It is a Diamond. The world NEEDS this book. The depth and resources and guidance this book provides is worth rubies.... [T]he intelligence and richness of this book is clear from the first page. Each page of this book addresses a different struggle. For example, your child may not want to hug, but they do need affection. Page 3 in the book opens up that conversation to help the parent determine what the child feels comfortable with. The parent can read page 3 to the child and start the conversation. There is also a correlating index in the back specifically for the issue addressed on page 3. The index equips and educated the parent on further details of that struggle and further education and activities to implement in your hope to build connection. That is just one of many examples and struggles represented which the book addresses.

"My suggestion to every parent that purchases this book is to read it before you read it to your child so that YOU as the parent are prepared for the conversation. This is not an easy breezy book, nor should it be. The is a life changing book and tackling trauma and emotional wounds head on. This book is phenomenal."

—Katie, book reviewer at LovingWellLivingWell.com


"Adoption is a Lifelong Journey provides children and parents with ways to understand and cope with the challenges that may arise in families created through adoption. It’s a valuable resource to adoptive families as well as the professionals who work with them."

—Liz Donalds, Psy.D., Licensed Clinical Psychologist


"I wanted to congratulate BPAR on a fantastic job with the book. I loved reading it - both the accuracy and poignancy of the child's words and thoughts, and the explanations and suggestions and resources for the adults - be they parents, professionals, etc., always a strong and positive reminder. My hope is the book gets widely circulated among families, mental health folk, docs, schools, agencies, etc. Very impressive!"

—Debra Olshever, Co-Founder of Adoption Associates


*****"As the sister of an adopted brother (many years ago), and as the aunt who was privileged to travel to China for a niece's adoption of her daughter, I found the first section of this book compelling as I read it from the perspective of the adopted child. In simple, sensitive, insightful language and drawings it beautifully shares what any adoptee may be feeling or thinking at any given moment and what approach, information, and sharing may be most helpful by parents, friends, teachers, etc. The second section has excellent suggestions for various situations accompanied by additional resources for the adults in the adoptees life. This book is a valuable resource."

—Grace on Goodreads

 

Charlie says, "Thank you for buying our book!"

Boston Post Adoption Resources (BPAR), a 501(c)(3) organization, devotes all proceeds from Adoption Is a Lifelong Journey to our mission to support and provide resources to anyone touched by adoption.